My Life As I Know It Is Over

I am a husband.  I am a father.  I am also gay.  About a month ago I was faced with two choices, or two paths.  I could continue on the path I had been on since High School.  This was a path where I walled off everything I perceived to be gay and ran to everything I perceived to be normal.  There are  reasons I walked this first path for so long, and they explain why I lived in denial’s prison for so long.  This path has been one that has led to depression, anger, bitterness, lack of confidence, and a host of other symptoms that make me a shell of who I used to be!  The second choice was to tell the truth — first to myself, and then to my wife.  This path had no clear or definite outcome and was surrounded with uncertainty.

In all honesty, staying on the first path was no longer an option for me.  My depression, anger, and bitterness were destroying me and those around me that I loved.  My wife was in a deep funk herself and had been for a number of years.  My kids were growing away from me — mainly because I was pushing them that way.  I was at a place where I was paralyzed with fear and burdened with a deep depression.

I had to choose the later.  I had to tell the truth.  And I had to do this without knowing what the results would be.This blog is going to be about the journey I am now on — both how I got here and where I end up going.  My hope is that it will serve as a resource for those that might be in the same struggle.

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One response to “My Life As I Know It Is Over

  1. Good luck on this journey.

    I’m checking out your blog at BearToast Joe’s recommendation.

    The decision to make this journey is probably the most important one you’ll ever make. There have been many before you who have made that tough decision, and there are many more still facing the decision. I wish you God Speed.

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