Marriage Over the Years

Marriage Over the Years


The Christian Post attempts to defend Pastor Sean Harris…

Just look at the title of this article…

“LGBT Groups Attack NC Pastor Before Gay Marriage Vote”

I’ve been over the the Christian Post several times because of Amendment One.  I must say that I was really disappointed with what I saw, especially on the message boards.  This title just makes it worse.

I’m just not sure how a Christian publication can defend someone that says these things and then tries to paint those that point it out as extreme.  Just go back and listen to the sermon.  It speaks for itself.  Here is an excerpt from the article…

However, gay advocacy groups are still attempting to paint the influential pastor as a hateful person ahead of the imminent vote to decide the terms of traditional marriage in North Carolina.

There is no “painting” that needs to be done.  He clearly articulates his position and then reinforces it with the pseudo apology and retraction.

via LGBT Groups Attack NC Pastor Before Gay Marriage Vote.

Pam’s House Blend – More Support For Defeating Amendment One

This is good news!  Go to Pam’s website (link below) to read the rest of the story!


More support against Amendment One: Chelsea Clinton, George Takei, Jason Mraz

By: Pam Spaulding Friday May 4, 2012 9:47 am

There’s a lot of support from all corners against Amendment One to report – the latest well-known names:

Chelsea Clinton, daughter of former President Bill Clinton, urges people to sign up for get-out-the-vote efforts to defeat it:

I believe that everyone must stand up for what is right, whenever possible, wherever possible.  I also believe that when the civil rights of any one American or group of Americans in one place are questioned, all Americans, everywhere, should care that the answer is the right one.  Those are lessons I learned at a young age from my parents and they are guiding principles in my life.

That is why I am joining you in opposing Amendment One in North Carolina. Amendment One unfairly targets women, children and families, gay and straight, who fall outside of the narrow definition of family articulated by those who drafted the legislation.

It is our duty to join the fight on behalf of both the gay and lesbian North Carolinians who were the original targets of the amendment and the tens of thousands of straight male and female North Carolinians who will be collateral damage if the amendment passes next Tuesday.

via Pam’s House Blend.

Thoughts on Amendment One from a Friend…

This was a post from a friend of mine.  She said I could post it on my blog.  Great thoughts and insights…



If you don’t think gay marriage is “right” then don’t have one, or support a faith community that supports them. But NC, educate yourselves. This is not ABOUT gay marriage- but are we really so without critical thinking skills, so ignorant, that we in NC cannot see the following: it doesn’t make “gay” marriage legal. Personally, I wish it did, but IT DOES NOT. So people worried about “protecting” marriage (from whom, btw? Do we need some marriage threat level warning system against perceived marriage terrorists?) – stop listening to people who are using you for their own political agendas. Don’t harm women and children, period, and don’t pass laws that do so simply because you are opposed to the idea that a low doesn’t even impact. USE LOGIC.

I’m still on a soapbox, so I will also say this. This issue is extremely important to me, and I have taken the time to understand it. I have talked to ministers, phds in religion and ethics, constitutional law folks, and phds in criminal justice. Perhaps, every one of you should do the same.If you do however, talk to scholars. Scholars are trained to: a) tell you their biases up front, and b) design valid and reliable studies that explore questions. I spent YEARS learning how to do that. My marriage, though legal and performed by an ordained, very faith-oriented, family- oriented, and Godly minister for whom I have the utmost respect, is not recognized in the Church I attended. In fact, that church considers my (straight) marriage a sin. So let me put it to you this way. The language of this amendment, ” marriage between one man and one woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized in this State”. Well, my Church interprets that as ONE marriage- divorce not allowed, and is a backer of this bill. So all of you supporting this because your minister says it’s a sin if you don’t- you better hope that you, or he, has never been divorced (and you better hope it is a he or YOU ARE WRONG in the eyes of some churches- who ARE IMPACTING POLITICAL DECISIONS. Because some Churches then think your (and definitely think that MY) legal, religious marriage, is not valid.

So riddle me this: Evangelical Protestant groups have compiled research on ministers. According to the FASICLD (Francis A. Schaeffer Institute of Church Leadership Development), “Eight hundred eight (808 or 77%) of the pastors we surveyed felt they did not have a good marriage. Three hundred ninety-nine (399 or 38%) of pastors said they were divorced or currently in a divorce process. Three hundred fifteen (315 or 30%) said they had either been in an ongoing affair or a one-time sexual encounter with a parishioner.”

According to Zikmund, Lummis, and Chang (1998), in their analysis of divorce trends –” and “ever divorced” is a much better measure of divorce rate than “currently divorced” because remarriage obscures the true divorce rate — the Southern Baptist clergy had among the lowest ever-divorced rates (17% of the women, 4% of the men), and the American Baptists (19% women, 13% men) and Evan. Lutheran Church in America (19% women, 9% men) were about tied. The highest clergy divorce rate is found among the Unitarian Universalists (47% women, 44% men) with the other denominations in between”. (WHICH, as an aside, I wonder who these Southern Baptist female clergy are? Wait, Children’s Ministry and Music Ministry). According to

– The normal lifestyle of American young adults is to live together for a period of time in a type of informal trial marriage. (CURRENTLY, Domestic Abuse is covered, under the new amendment, it might not be. WE DON’T KNOW)

-Couples enter into their first marriage at a older age than in the past.

– A growing percentage of committed couples have decided to live in a common-law relationship rather than get married. This is particularly true among some elderly who fear reduction in government support payments.

– When 3,854 adults from the 48 contiguous states were surveyed (The margin of error is ±2 percentage points). The survey found:

11% of the adult population is currently divorced.

25% of adults have had at least one divorce during their lifetime.

Divorce rates among conservative Christians were significantly higher than for other faith groups, and much higher than Atheists and Agnostics experience.


Religion % have been divorced

Jews 30%

Born-again Christians 27%

Other Christians 24%

Atheists, Agnostics 21%

My point (finally):

There is no evidence that religion has a protective influence on marriage. FOR ONCE, NC, look at what is really happening instead of how you wish it would be. That has never helped our state, but we have a long history of bigotry, hatred, racism, and sexism. Again, if you want to protect the family, then for goodness sake, work on your own. But you had better be really sure, that if you oppose this due to what your preacher/minister/priest has told you, that they live what they preach, and that one day vague poorly written laws don’t impact your freedom or rights.

via (2) If you don’t think….

Pastor Sean Harris Clarifies what he meant in his “beat the gay away” sermon.

I really just became aware of this, but it speaks for itself.  Listen to the entire sermon and you will get a fantastic picture of what gay kids face growing up  in the church.  While most pastors and congregations are not quite so “bold” in their proclamation against homosexuality, the undercurrent is the same.  The message that gay people receive could not be more clear.  What REALLY gets me is this half-assed, lame excuse for an apology.  While Dan Savage is NOT my favorite commentator, his apology for saying pansy assed and bullshit at least appeared to be sincere.  Pastor Sean Harris should be ashamed.  He took his apology as another opportunity to “punch” the gay community in the face and “crack their wrists”

Important Clarification to Sundays Sermon 4/29/2012Dear Berean Family,By now you may know that my words, from Sunday mornings sermon, about effeminate behavior in children are being completely taken out of context by those in the LGBT community. Nearly every article is misquoting me.Clearly, I would like to have been more careful with exactly what I said, but sometimes I say things without enough clarity. I trust you understood my intent in the context of my total preaching ministry. If you did not, I would be more than happy to meet with you privately to provide clarity. Just reply to this email. I provided clarity to the Fayetteville Observer today, but I cannot be sure they will accurately report my words. For the record, I want to ensure everyone that I do NOT believe physical force is capable of fixing effeminate behavior or homosexual behavior. Parents should not punch babies or children. Ultimately only the gospel of Jesus Christ has the power to deliver one from sexual immorality and behavior including effeminacy;

via Pastor Seans Blog.

Amendment One and Healthcare – Hear about Melissa

Know + Love: Krista Tillman – on NC & Amendment One

via Know + Love: Krista Tillman – YouTube.