Still learning how to “reblog”. I’ll remove the other post shortly. Enjoy…
Lesbian Gay Bisexual & Transgender Alumni of Bob Jones University
Ed. note:Bob Jones University’s reach extends far beyond the two hundred acre campus it inhabits in Greenville, South Carolina. Throughout the United States and around the world, Bob Jones University’s influence is strongly felt, particularly within the independent fundamental baptist (IFB) movement, which includes many Christian schools that funnel students to BJU and other IFB-affiliated colleges. Today, we present the first part of a tale by a courageous young man who came to us shortly after his whole world fell apart while attending summer music camp at Bob Jones University. Expelled from his Christian high school just a few weeks before graduation because he confided to a friend that he thought he might be gay, meet
Jonathan Nichols (formerly BJU class of 2015), Part One
My story is going to be slightly different than the others featured on this blog because I actually never attended Bob Jones University
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Here is a link to the podcast from my post on the message that blew me away at Buckhead Church. Take the time to listen to it… you won’t be sorry you did. Trust.
This the kinds of stuff that make me craaaaaazzzzzyyyy….
via Religious Right Defends Criminalization of Homosexuality – YouTube.
This is the message I mentioned on Sunday by Andy Stanley for Northpoint Church. The link is just below the summary. Let’s just say that I’m still in amazement. The first time I go back to church looking for a place I can connect and THIS is the message I hear! While it doesn’t describe my situation exactly, it comes pretty dang close. Watch it and come to your own conclusions.
Christian, Part 5
Andy Stanley
The people Jesus loved were messy. The way Jesus loved was messy. He ate with tax collectors and talked with adulterers. His disciples struggled and we still struggle today to understand his extraordinary love. In this message, Andy Stanley unwraps the two ingredients that made Jesus – love revolutionary – the secret of the most irresistible message ever preached.
This is beyond crazy. Linking the repeal of DADT to the prostitution scandal in the Secret Service? And how do you “enforce” open homosexuality exactly? Sheesh.
Said Perkins:
Just for a moment step back and look at the implications of this, over the weekend we saw the news of the President’s Secret Service detail in Colombia and the issue of them hiring prostitutes and now the White House is outraged about that. Actually in a meeting this morning my staff asked, ‘why should the President be upset’? It was actually legal; it was legal there to do that, so why should we be upset? Well, the fact is we intuitively know it’s wrong, there’s a moral law against that.
The same is true for what the President has done to the military enforcing open homosexuality in our military. You can change the law but you can’t change the moral law that’s behind it. You can change the positive law, the law that is created by man, but you can’t change the moral law, it’s wrong. So what you have is you have a total breakdown and you can’t pick and choose. Morality is not a smorgasbord; you can’t pick what you want. I think you’re absolutely right, this is a fundamental issue going forward because if we say ‘let them do what we want,’ what’s next? You cannot maintain moral order if you are willing to allow a few things to slide.
When I started this blog, it was to serve as a journal and encouragement to others. I wanted it to be a place where I could share, reflect and grow. I’ve become side tracked my “stuff” and my new blogging friend Matt has helped me see that without saying a word to me specifically. I’m still going to post things I’m passionate about, but I’m not going to neglect my Christian journey or my coming out experience. You can read about Matt’s journey at his blog. Please be kind in your words, even if you disagree. My response to his post titled, “It Gets Better…Temporarily” is below the video.
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Matt, my experience is a bit different than yours. It’s a long story, but I shut off the gay part of me for most of my life. I grew up in a conservative evangelical community, went to seminary and entered ministry. My life verse was Phil 3:10. It is at the bottom of every journal page of mine from my sophomore in college forward. “I want to know Christ and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings.”
I was a happy and fun-loving guy that was so good at hiding the gay part of me that I fooled myself. The “lifestyle” you speak of was foreign to me. I never experienced the heterosexual or homosexual extremes. I never strayed outside of my marriage, but just continued to stuff these feelings deep inside. Slowly, this started to eat away at me. My personality totally changed. I went from being the uber optimistic guy, great husband and “fun dad” to a shell of a person that no one recognized. During this time I was seeking God, planting a church and trying to hold life together.
After about 12 years of marriage, kids and a long time in ministry, I was looking in the mirror one day and said, “This is stupid, you’re gay.” Matt, I knew not ONE gay person. I had a couple of friends who had been in and out of being a lesbian, but I didn’t know any other gay guy.
That has marked the beginning a journey of discovering who I am. Fortunately, I have some wonderful family and friends that are walking with me. It has been painful for my family, as we both realized that this had been the cause of both of our depression and are divorcing. My kids are doing great… and for this I am eternally grateful.
I hear you passion and don’t question your sincerity. Please hear mine. I’ve observed those in the ex-gay ministry…friends of mine…encourage guys like you to get married because that makes things better. Please caution the guys that I know will come to you for seeing this as a solution. Marriage is hard enough for two people that are naturally attracted to each other. Be sure that at the very least, both parties go into the marriage with eyes wide open.
Well-meaning Christians have told me that I can’t be gay and Christian. I refuse to accept that. Typically (not always), these Christians seem to be motivated more by fear, hate or anger than a true passion for God. Not ONE person in the world but God knows my heart, or anyone else’s heart of that matter. Above all else, continue to be kind in your words. I love the quote from Philo of Alexandria… “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.”
Just know this… I am here. I will pray for you. Hopefully we can both stumble our ways through this life and meet the loving embrace of our Savior. I hope nothing but the best for you.
I leave you with one other quote from the movie “The Help” that I just love. It has had to be my mantra over the past few months…
“Ever morning, until you dead in the ground, you gone have to make this decision. You gone have to ask yourself, “Am I gone believe what them fools say about me today?” — Kathryn Stockett (The Help)
Grace and Peace.
Great article I just stumbled on from last year over at John Shore’s Website. Click on the link below. I know you will be encouraged.
The Elephant in the Room: “I Remain, Still, a Gay Christian” | JohnShore.com.
The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable. –Jim Davis
Truth is not something abstract. It is real. It is definable. If something is true, well, then it is true. Just because you say an apple is blue and tastes like a blueberry doesn’t make it so. Our culture is really funny when it comes to truth. We are taught from an early age that we should “never tell a lie.” We are told stories about George Washington and chopping down that cherry tree. We are instructed that there is nothing more noble than the truth and that sometimes the truth hurts.
The problem is that most of the people that are saying those things are lying about telling the truth. I find it very ironic. I keep thinking of the scene in A Few Good Men where Colonel Jessup (Jack Nicolson) was put on the stand to testify about the Code Red. Here is the excerpt.
YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH. When it comes to sexuality and more specifically gay sexuality, most people can’t. So, rather than allowing kids growing up to be true to who they are… or at least openly express and explore the feelings that they have… they are not only told to tell the truth, but they are told what that truth is. Even when it comes to issues that no one could know but the child. I don’t think that in most cases there is bad intent here. The vast majority of parents are merely doing what our culture has always done — attempt to raise good little girls that like good little boys and good little boys that like good little girls.
If it were only so simple. Unfortunately, this results in many kids growing up confused, frustrated, repressed on one end and rebellious, promiscuous and destructive on the other. In my case, I was in the confused, frustrated and repressed category… so much so that I ended up getting married, having three kids and in my mid thirties before I finally handled my truth. And of the guys like me, I am on the very young end. Most are in their 50s when they finally can’t take it any more.
Today, I feel so grateful to be where I am. In the midst of the pain is hope, and regardless the ability to finally be authentic to who I am is incredible. It hurts like hell and it is hurting those around me… but continuing to live a lie was just no longer an option. In the next post I’ll go back to my life growing up in a small town in North Carolina and how it shaped my family and shaped my life.
soultwist 